Self-compassion

How am I doing?

I think this question is the most important thing at the moment. Often our quick answer is: „Fine“ or „I'm fine“ when someone else asks us that. But have we even noticed ourselves? Asking myself this question does not even mean that I have to have an answer ready, nor is it a request for self-optimization or self-assessment. The question could be a lovingly meant invitation to pause for a moment and listen: Do I take myself true and How do I perceive myself? In this moment - consciously making contact with myself.

How was it with you? Have you been asked in your past or as a child: „How are you?“ or „Are you happy?“ Most of us would probably answer: „Rarely or not at all...“ - Isn't that sad? What this usually means later in life is that we no longer ask ourselves this question. We start the day and immediately focus on the things that need to be done. „What's on the agenda today?“ - „Will I be able to do it?“ And then we go into autopilot and the events determine the dynamics of my experience. It would be possible to shape the day myself at any moment. I could stop whatever activity I'm doing and take one or two conscious breaths as a connection to the now, as a connection to my body, mind... to my soul and I could make a conscious choice about what would be good for me right now. My soul is just a breath away, patiently waiting for me to make contact - it's there - can you feel it?

This question: „How am I doing?“ could help me to consciously let go of the outside, of the noise in my head, and turn towards it. myself, immerse yourself in the inner garden the silence that always rests within me, just a breath away. Ah, how soothing that is. And this question goes even deeper and doesn't just want to know, what I am currently experiencing in my human experience, but „whether I am well“, whether I am experiencing joy or lightness, whether I am happy? Someone (namely myself) has a real interest in ME, a Self-feeling. 

A colleague and friend of mine - Lee Harris - once told me that he did this every day for a while: In the morning in the bathroom, he would look in the mirror, his hands on his heart, he would take one or two conscious breaths with himself and then he would ask himself: „Do you feel joy“. Then he waited and listened within himself until the answer came from his heart (not from his mind). And when he heard a „no“ for 3 days in a row, he stopped his activities and first of all took care of his „well-being“ before devoting himself to the obligations of everyday life again. When he told me this, I immediately sensed how true it was. But if you overlook it again and again or ignore it all too often and take others/other things more seriously than your own enjoyment of life, then the harmonious balance within you starts to falter and the spiral into possible psychosomatic illnesses begins to turn.

But if I could already consciously feel it here: „I am no longer the creator of my experience, but aspects of „I must“ and „I should“ have taken over. When I realize that I have aChoice how happy could everyday life continue for me then? It doesn't mean that I won't do anything anymore, that I won't take part in life. I think I might even be able to live with a new Power and Inspiration, embrace life as it presents itself to me. Playfully and creatively ... I would use the Dance life... Observe what goes on inside you when I say that. Do you feel your joy flare up, an inner awakening, or does your mind play it down and something dampens you?

YES, YES and YES again...

... you can work in JOY be - every day! 

There is no one behind you saying: Yes, but only when you have done your duty... Maybe tomorrow for 20 minutes or ... when you breathe ... or meditate. NO, your life should be fun! 

YOU and only you can do that ALLOW!

You can „let it happen“ ... Gabi Frosch and I have recorded our latest podcast on this topic. If you would like to listen to our conversations, you can always find our latest podcasts on my website in my podcast player: Listen to your breath - let it happen or with Spotify

„Allowing“ is an interesting word and it was only in the last week that I came to a new understanding of it. It is often mentioned in spiritual discussions. A NOT DO by allowing life to serve me for my highest good. I open - so to speak - my vessel and am ready to RECEIVE, an inner attitude that allows me to consciously create what corresponds to my intention. Last week, I noticed that during this inner process, my gaze is often directed towards the outside. On what I want to „manifest“, or on allowing my (external) experience to be what life is currently offering me. But what if, in the attitude of inner ALLOWING, I turn my gaze lovingly, compassionately inwards, towards myself in this moment? When I sense that my Heart may become wide: „For myself“ ... That I ALLOW myself to feel what I feel, experience and think... To not let my heart become narrow with everything I encounter in the process FOR ME. To lovingly observe the „strange“ things I am saying and thinking and the patterns that have made me act unconsciously again. Not suppressing this and pretending that none of this exists in me, but rather the Poor to open for my Being human. To ALLOW that I AM AS I AM... in this moment. To become soft and gentle with myself. And if what I consciously see now doesn't feel GOOD, if I haven't perceived any joy in myself for 3 days, to actively change things FOR ME. To act (not react) in Self-feeling. I think it can be wonderful, don't you agree... Let's try it, (new) life is waiting for us! Are you ready?

Kind regards
sandra

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